Benny's is here and helping tame the wild Texas west

The past two days have been fraught, my new favorite word, absolutely fraught with anxiety and tension. I have to blame the over abundance of animals in shelters, their sad faces begging for a chance to live. They just don't know why their families have dropped them off and abandoned them. They do not know what they did wrong.

There are so many seniors, puppies, cats, kittens, just droves and droves. Speaking of droves, Benny is here. Yesterday, when I was so stressed about all these poor ones I couldn't save..just so dang many..I kept thinking of Benny and how he has held on and hoped. Benny is a seer. He's really more than any other being I can think of. He is in a dog suit, but like a very wise man...almost like I would imagine Gandhi was in person. Just calm and centered. Knowing that he's a part of the universe, but not the whole universe.

Patti and Benny

When he got here with Patti yesterday, I put the pedal to the metal and couldn't get to our meeting place fast enough. One of the stresses had been my old car going kaput. That battery just gave out like I'm gonna give out one of these days..just short circuit on the side of the road somewhere. You'll see me spinning around and around in the gravel like some old deranged break dancer.

Anyway, all day yesterday and more days before than I care to mention, I'd start to go off and have to remember to stay calm for Benny's sake. I can't do him or anyone else any good if I lose it. Benny gets me. Benny gets everyone. He gets letters from all over the world. He has already touched so many lives in just three weeks.

When I got to the Iguana, our meeting place, he was sitting in Patti's back seat. Patti had driven Benny all the way here from California. Patti is a whole other blog. She is as angelic as Benny. I am extremely blessed to have Benny and Patti in my life.

I haven't wanted to write very much on the blog here lately since I lost Paris Hilton. I'm so sad. I feel like I let him down. I found out that the seeds I was using from Tomlinson's killed Paris Hilton. They were old and had rancid fat. I found out that some of these seed salespeople and companies are very unscrupulous. I should have known better, but thought I was giving him quality seed from a reputable pet store. Wrong. Even though I feed the birds chopped up fresh organic veggies, quality pellets and home grown sprouts for birds, I added a seed mixture for what I thought was a well balanced bird diet. I learned the hard way and through the death of my beloved Paris Hilton.

I am turning it loose now. I won't hang onto bad feelings. That's what Benny and the Animal Alliance are teaching me. In order to stay centered and open to direction, I have to let go of the anger. I feel it's necessary to write it down so other bird lovers won't lose their pets as I lost Paris Hilton. I am sorry to Paris.

Further stress came from a small shelter I'd been saving dogs from. I had to borrow two crates from them in order to transport two dogs Reunion rescued from them. I paid the transporter to save these two and Suzie Wong who's now called Mabel. The dogs were taken all the way to San Francisco and the crates only made it back to Modesto where they've been sitting for three weeks. I tried to replace the crates, but it's really easier to home a pit bull than to transport crates from one town to the other.

Bottom line, I got so many stressful emails about the crates today that I'm gonna have to think twice before I pull another dog from that shelter. Same sort of thing happened a couple of years ago when I pulled Pip from a shelter nearby this one. The shelter got very nasty over the Pip incident...fully described in Pit Bull Nation, The Story of Pip. I just don't have the fortitude to pull dogs from shelters whose employees spend their workday criticizing volunteer rescue workers.

Back to Benny. Back to breathing. I got a nice photo of Benny this morning from Doug. He, Benny, is fitting right into the schedule at Doug's. Maybe I can take a page from Benny's book and learn how to fit into the scheme of things in my crazy life.

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